The Devil Delights in Derailing the Details

Things very rarely go as I expect them to.  I find this fact to be very upsetting.  It can and will completely shoot my day from ok-ish straight down into the fiery depths of hell.

Even something small.  Something miniscule.  Something that should have gone exactly as I had planned it was so tiny.  But it doesn’t.  And I say, “What the $*#*?!  How did that even go wrong?!”

It is like those people who are floating down a river in inner tubes.  Some people just lay there and somehow manage to stay in the middle of the river.  I am one of those people who is constantly working to stay in the middle of the river.  As soon as I start to relax, I start drifting to the side (where the snakes and scary shadows are!).  So I am constantly working, not relaxing, and not having a particularly good time.

Screw it.  What comes will come.  Maybe I just need to get out of the river the next time I hit the side.  It’s a stupid river anyway.

And I am not going to be upset about that thing that went wrong today when it couldn’t possible have gotten messed up.

 

Ok, I was hoping that right after I said that it would be true.  Deep breaths.

One dollar at the grocery store, one dog toy, one smile at a stranger.  Those are the things I should be deciding upon, the things I should be acting on.  I do not need to exert effort trying to fix something that I have no control over.  Something done, even if it is not what I had planned to do, is better than nothing done.

Thanks for listening.  It helped a lot to get that out.

Rachel

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